Weapon
by ManhattanWitch
Summary: No one knew weapons better than Jayne. And hell, that girl wasn't nuttin' more than a weapon, wasn't she?
1. Chapter 1

Weapon

Summary- no one knew weapons better than Jayne. And hell, that girl wasn't nuttin' more than a weapon, wasn't she?

Jayne eyeballed the girl from across the cargo bay. She was sitting on the catwalk, feet hangin free as she followed the toss of the ball back and forth. The rest of the crew was all playing, makin fun of each other for missin shots and the like. He snorted from his weight bench. They'd asked him to play but he'd said no- he had sumthing that needed thinking on, and he did his best thinking whilst liftin.

A grunt escaped his lips as he hefted the barbell and returned to his prior topic of thought- the girl. Funny little moonbrain, watching the ball like she knew where it was going and all. And her feet swingin front and back was a bit distracting.

The girl'd been getting better about bein' crazy, since the shit with Miranda had hit the fan. To his mind it seemed liked she'd used most a her crazy on killing a room fulla Reavers. That had been mighty impressive, seeing her standing there, all crazy-like, covered in gallons of blood. He'd bet then, and been proved right at the Alliance hospital, that none of it had been hers. Mighty impressive, the merc thought.

Girl was still bat shit crazy though. Broke inside, like. Head wasn't sittin too squarely on them pretty small little shoulders of hers. He scowled at that thought- _ain't that I think she's pretty, _he reminded himself. _Just that she's pretty small._ He grunted in frustration and sat up, adding more weight to the bar. So. The girl was broke, and crazy, and impressive. Well sure she was, what with them Academy types messing with her brainpan and amygly-somesuch for however long. Jayne figured she deserved to be at least a bit messed up from all that _ go se_. As long as she aint taking that craziness a hers out on any of his crew. Them's that was as close to a family as he'd got out in the black- and as close to family as she'd got either.

Those that spawned her didn't deserve to keep her. Just handing their daughter over to arseholes like the gorram monsters that ruined her- his blood was boiling just thinkin about it. At least she got that pansy-ass brother of hers. Wasn't entirely without relation.

He finally put down the weights as the game wound to a close. From the exultant looks on Mal and Kaylee's faces, and the way they were making fun of the other team, they'd beaten Simon and Wash real soundly.

Jayne chuckled and wiped sweat off his forehead. He was kinda glad he hadn't been on a team this time around, thinking that dinner was gonna be fun tonight.

She liked that he was thinking about her. His head was full of thoughts with no destinations, though. She wondered if those flickering ideas were ever going to reach a conclusion. Bear man, gun man, big solid steady man who thought in big solid straight lines made it easy for her to do the same. She smiled.

And kicked her feet some more.

I know that this is a short chapter, but it's just the introductory one. More to come soon, I hope.

Ta


	2. Chapter 2

Weapon 2

Jobs where someone ended up in the infirmary always made the crew mope around for days. Jayne frowned. It was just a scratch! And the bloody doc had ordered him to stay in the hellish white room overnight. He hated the infirmary, hated Mal for agreeing to the doc's orders. Hell, right now he even hated Kaylee for looking so sad when she watched the pansy stitch his arm up. He was fine- he didn't need no one to take care of him when nuttin was wrong.

The faint sound of shoes on the floor snapped him out of his funk (and he smugly thought that no one else would have heard it). His eyes narrowed as he watched the girl peek around the corner. "Whatcha want, Crazy?"

Her eyes travelled across his face, then landed on his arm. "Preliminary stage of healing accomplished- secondary stage must have slumber to be productive."

He fought against grounding his teeth as he figured that one out. "You sayin I gotta sleep?" he asked after a bit.

Moonbrain looked relieved that she hadn't had to repeat herself. "Yes." She sidled into the room and Jayne watched her closely. 'Twas obvious she wasn't done with being here yet as she hadn't _left_ yet. She fidgeted around the white, white room (who thought sleeping in here would be restful, anyway. It was too gorram _bright_). Tensing as she opened and closed drawers, he waited for her to say her piece so's he could maybe try and get some sleep. By the time she'd gotten all the way around the room and back to the door, Jayne was ready to try and throw something.

But Crazy just looked at him and gave him one a her addlepated half smiles. "Captain Daddy didn't get shot today." She stated, before bolting out of the room and towards the sleeping quarters.

Jayne snorted. "No, Crazy, _I _got shot today." He shook his head and rolled over to the side without the bullet hole. Sleep. Yea. He needed sleep, if Crazy was gonna start seekin him out.

He got let outta the infirmary the next morning, Simon sayin it was on account of his not being able to take any more of Jayne's bitchin. Since the smell of protein cakes was all over the gorram ship, he headed to the kitchen, hoping there was some left for him. Healin always made him hungrier than a neopuma. The sounds of laughter stopped when he got in the room, and he rolled his eyes. He grabbed the plate of cakes in his left hand, thinking that being amby-dextrus or whatever the fancy word the Doc had used was useful for shit like this, when his right arm was lain up in a sling.

He sat in his normal seat, ignoring everyones eyes on him. He palmed a knife off the table and spun it deftly before slicing a chunk of protein and shoving it in his mouth. Jayne looked around as he chewed, wondering why everyone was still staring at him. Through his mouthful, he said, "Ain't you got anything better to do than watch me eatin'?"

Zoe cleared her throat, and Mal shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Jayne," the Captain started, "I wanted to say something about yesterday. If you hadn't-"

Jayne cut the man off, planting the knife point first into the tabletop. "Now see here, I don't wanna talk about yesterday. All I wanna do is finish my damn breakfast! And maybe talk to the Doc there about getting this pain in the arse sling off." With that he returned to shoveling his face full of food, grateful when Wash started telling Kaylee a story. Now they'd leave him alone.

'Course, that would be when Crazy dropped in to the seat next to him. And started picking off his plate.

Again.

The merc was hiding in his bunk after his visit with Simon. The Doc had said that the sling had to stay one for a week, which Jayne thought was complete bull. Hell, his arm didn't even hurt that much. But whatever. Doc hadn't been wrong about stuff like this, not once. And hell Jayne could admit to himself that he trusted the younger man when it came to medical problems. After he'd gotten stitched together after Miranda, the Doc had taken care of all of them, personally. He'd even did that big damn surgery on Wash, fixing that hole in his side but good and making sure the funny little man stayed shiny all through the healin.

Doc was good peoples, and that's a fact, but Jayne never was one for sitting around. And the Cap'n had gotten them off a the ground real fast after the job- _and_ he said they wasn't gonna set back down till everyone on board was nice and shiny, like. Least Jayne had hit the cathouse before the shit had started the other day.

So he packed his ladies up into a duffel bag and slung the strap around his neck, hauling himself one handed up the ladder and walking towards the kitchen. He figured a lot of the gun maintenance needed two hands, but he also figured there was a lot he could do with just the one. Well he'd see for sure in a bit.

Crazy was sitting at the table when he got there, but he ignored her and pulled off the bag, whipping it open. He grinned a bit when she jumped. The girl had her sketch book out, drawing who knows what, and as he settled at the table he decided to ignore her. Crazy hadn't pulled a stunt since a month of so back, so while Jayne figured she was due one, he figured she looked calm enough.

So he started taking apart Sevra, one a his new girls. She was a beaut, alright, all shiny chrome and ebon handle grip. He'd lifted her off a one of them that had shot at him the other day, figuring that the dead guy wouldn't miss it much. Though he wouldn't tell Mal where he'd gotten her, if the man asked.

He took her apart gently, getting angry as he realized her pretty outside was a lie. The inside of the gun, and all its parts, was caked in some kinda crap Jayne wasn't gonna think on too much. With a snort he fished out his cleaning tools and started gently getting the grime off her.

Cleaning a gun was something the merc did when he had to think about something. Jayne figured the rest of the crew was gonna leave him alone for that reason, and for the reason of his arm- wasn't like he could do any heavy lifting yet or anything. So he let his mind wander. But it didn't really go far, letting the repetitive motion of the actions lull his head. Concentrating so hard on cleaning Sevra, though, he'd forgotten about the girl sitting across from him. So when she scrambled to her feet and darted away, he almost dropped the barrel of the gun in surprise. Jayne growled, glad no one had been around to see the near miss.

Perking his ears, he heard footsteps, and wondered why Simon was heading for the kitchen when it wasn't dinner time yet. The Doc poked his head around the corner, the sighed.

"I don't suppose you've seen River around, have you? It's time for her medicine and I can't find her."

The merc frowned up at the other man. "Naw, aint seen her around since lunch."

Simon sighed again and muttered "Thanks" before disappearing. Jayne wondered at himself. He didn't get why he'd covered for moonbrain. And, he sent the spot where the doc was a look- the girl had left the sketchbook right out on the table. Boy had to start using his eyes. No wonder he could never find that sister of his.

Shining, shining, calm smooth circles bringing out light and prettiness and deadly efficiency. Hiding also, hide in plain sight, ally against drugs that cloud the mind and break down walls. Didn't let beloved brother know the direction that she fled, not from him but from the drugs. Smile for the bear man, smile for the ally.

Drugs are good for body, bad for brain- solid walls become cracked and flawed. Useless against the invasion of others.

Bear man broke his paw, so now he cleans his fangs.

Smile for the bear man.

... ... ...

Thanks to envielestrange for pointing out i had filed this wrong, but its fixed now :)


	3. Chapter 3

Weapon 3

Finally that gorram sling was off, and Jayne promptly ignored the Doc's warning about using the arm too much, too fast. The merc was just happy that he could properly clean his weapons for the first time in more than a week. They was still in the black, but heading down to Persephone for some work for Badger. So, Jayne figured, he needed to make sure all his ladies were in top shape. Otherwise when shit went bad he'd be stuck up _go se_ river.

So right after breakfast he went to his room and got all his ladies and brought them all to the kitchen table. Sevra was decent, he figured, so he started with Vera. Damn, but she needed a good going over- still caked with grime for her last outing. He was cleaning her in peace til Crazy showed up. Though if he was gonna be honest it was still peaceful, just the sound of him oiling Vera's barrel and Crazy sketchin away. Jayne had broken the Callahan down into all her parts, so he could get his favorite gun all nice and clean. Barrel, stock, trigger, firing pin, all laid out nice and neat in front of him, waiting their turn to get cleaned and shiny.

And as the merc went through the motions, a ritual he knew like the back of his hand, he brain thought about Miranda. Once again he thought how damn shiny the girl had looked, surrounded by all them bodies. From the little bit of fighting he'd seen before the blast doors closed, the girl had moved like a gorram dancer. A dancing fighter. He'd always felt bad that he'd been too hurt in the leg to have helped, but fuck it all if Crazy didn't need any help. Room full a Reavers? She hadn't even looked outta breath. Jayne guessed that didn't really surprise him, given that the Academy had made her into a gorram weapon.

He stopped dead, hands in the middle of fitting Vera back together. He looked at the gun, half in pieces and half put together, then at the Crazy girl drawin on the other side of the table. _Well damn me to hell and back_ Jayne thought. _The gorram girl's like a broken gun_.

And the more he rolled the thought around in his head, the more it made sense. Girl was missin pieces, and parts a her were broke, and she might look shiny on the outside but on the inside everything was put together wrong.

Jayne snarled, and Moonbrain jerked in surprise but he ignored her. Hell he didn't care if the chit was lookin in his head now either. The Gorram pieces of _go se_ had broke her up, taken her apart, and tried to fit the wrong pieces together again.

Crazy nodded slowly. "Professional interest in brainpan made the girl unstable and implosive." Then she paused and started rocking back and forth, eyes becoming wider, and in Jayne's head more than a mite creepy. "_Two by two, hands of blue…."_

"Now cut that out, you gorram idjit. Them's that messed with your head is all gone now." He scowled and rapidly finished putting Vera together. Standing up he packed his stuff and headed for his bunk, irritated that the girl had shown up. She'd interrupted his thinking _and_ his guns.

But however irritated he was, he couldn't stop the thought that she was just like Sevra. Looked normal on the outside, fucked up as sin on the inside. He slept on that thought, not realizing that the meeting with Badger went real smooth because of the feral glower on his face. All the way back to the ship Jayne thought about that, thinking about all the weapons he knew and knew how ta fix. Ignoring the concerned looks on Inara and Zoe's faces, he inhaled his food, well what Crazy left on his plate, and retreated to his bunk.

For a couple hours he just sat in his bunk and thought about it. Maybe, the girl wasn't as fucked in the brainpan just because she was a genius. Them that took her normal away, they took her apart and put her together to make a deadly, secret weapon. But they did it wrong cuz they broke her and put her together wrong.

But Jayne, he was good with weapons. And if he forgot that the moonbrain could kill him with her mind, maybe he could fix her.

... ... ...

No River POV today- this is all Jayne. Real short, and im sorry about that but I figured it needed its own separate chapter.

Also, Jayne in this is supposed to be a little OOC but if its too much lemme know. Im trying to keep him in character as much as possible but still make it a viable storyline.

Ta


	4. Chapter 4

Weapon 4

Jayne got his chance to maybe see about fixing the girl when the job for Badger went off without a hitch. Cuz the thievery went so fast, the Cap'n had given the crew the rest of the day to wander around, provided they was back before nightfall. Now normally the merc would be headin for the nearest cathouse, but today he wanted to try out his idea. So he waited til everyone had gone to do whatever they was gonna do, then went looking for the girl. He found her in the cargo hold, feet swinging off the catwalk as she watched people walking by. Kaylee was sitting in her little sunchair, dosing off, and the preacher was reading his Good Book.

Neither of them saw him, 'cept for Crazy, so he waved at her to follow him and turned to the kitchen. He listened to the barely there sound of her feet on the metal grates, and made a note to teach her to walk as quietly as he was. When they got to the kitchen there were two guns sitting side by side, along with cleaning stuffs. She paused in the doorway.

The merc sat in his regular seat, and patted the one beside him irritably. "Sit" he said. She crept over and sat, cocking her head at him.

"Imma teach you how to clean a gun. Now, I reckon you figure you know how, what with the Academy making you a killin machine and all-" he ignored her flinch when he mentioned the Academy. "But you don't. Only Cobbs know how to clean a gun right."

And so he showed her. Take it apart, piece by piece, line it up, clean it to shiny, put together. Trade guns, repeat.

And when he fell into the comfortable rhythm himself, he felt the moonbrain relax beside him, matching her pace to his. Break down, clean, reassemble, trade.

Finally Jayne figured the guns were clean enough and stopped, leaning back in his chair and watching her finish up. His mind was still caught in the lazy circles the task always brought, and watching her as she finished up made him figure he was doing right by her. Well, he hoped so. She looked a mite calmer, at least.

Crazy looked up at him as she slid the last piece into place. "Meditative repetition." She announced with a smile.

He grunted at her as he gathered up his guns. "If you get any good at this I might let you do Vera one day."

The first time Mal walked in on the two of them bent over guns, Jayne woulda swore the Cap'n nearly had a heart attack. The merc tensed, waiting for the man to start yelling, but Crazy beat him to it. "Meditative repetition!" she chirped happily.

The merc grunted and said "It shuts her up." He wasn't gonna even try to explain to the Cap'n what he was trying to do.

Mal tried again. "Now I'm not too sure what you mean, River, but you can't just be playing with guns. Isn't safe."

Crazy frowned. "Is of legal age, can and will learn to handle weapons with or without Captain Daddy's consent. And-" she continued, when Mal went to say something, "Man-with-girls-name didn't offer I made him."

_That_ took the wind outta Mal's sails real fast, Jayne thought smugly. Though he didn't stop trying. "Now listen here I'm the Captain of this ship and you'll do as I say."

The girl gave him a look, doe eyes and pouty lips and everything. "Captain Daddy doesn't want me to be able to defend myself?"

The Captain struggled for words, but the look and the logic made him admit defeat. So he rounded on Jayne. "If she so much as gets a blister, I am going to toss you out of the airlock for good!"

"Now wait a second, Mal! That's not fair!"

The Captains eyes darkened. "I don't care- as far as I'm concerned this is all your fault, so you get all the responsibility for it. Don't even try to get out of it either." The man warned as he turned and headed towards the bridge.

Jayne glowered at his retreating back, man gripping the Cindy's stock. But he felt a light pat on his shoulder, and turned to find the girl watching him, polishing rag in one hand, barrel in the other, waiting for him to continue. The merc sighed and relaxed, running the rag over the stock in his hand. Gorram arse of a captain…

By the end of the week he was sure she'd gotten gun cleaning down. And that thing she kept repeating, med-eta-tiv repation or whatever, seemed to be workin. She sure as hell was a lot calmer when she was cleaning the guns. Maybe it wasn't such a cockamamie idea for him to try and fix her.

Though she was still batshit insane. Simon had finally caught her and convinced her to take the medicine, and she spent the next few hours hiding in corners and freaking out when anyone came near her. Not to mention the mumbling to herself and rockin back and forth. After that she'd passed out, and when she came to she'd gone back to flingin shit at the Doc's head before bolting out of the infirmary. Jayne had found that part funny, and had left them to trying to calm her down. He ended up sitting on his weight bench, even though it was surrounded by crates of their current shipment.

He'd taken Binky out of her sheath and was sharpening her with a whetstone when Simon had come by. "Have you seen River?" the Doc asked a bit desperately. Jayne just shook his head and continued sharpening the knife. Distant look on his face, the man walked away.

"Crazy," Jayne asked after a moment, "Why you hidin from your brother?"

There was a moment of silence, and then a whisper came from behind the crate closest to him. "Bad medicine dents the walls."

"Hmm." The merc didn't say anything else, just continued to make the oddly comforting _stropping_ sound as the whetstone hit the metal.

Noise, nightmares, too loud mind voices _screaming_ in her head and her walls were down and gone and she couldn't keep them out. Brother worries, all the time, and she can't not hear it when the medicine makes her walls disappear. Hide, must hide. But Bear man finds her and doesn't give away the secret and he makes the noise go away with his head. Strop, strop, strop… comforting, easing sound.

"Noise producted by implement decreases external stimulation." She whispers into the dark, and the bear man stays there and calms her, calmly calmly now…

So this seems to be the length of my chapters, though I suppose every now and then one will be shorter or longer. Still not sure how many chapters this is going to have, but im gonna guess around 10?

laters


	5. Chapter 5

Weapon 5

So he'd figured out what that work had meant- _meditation. _Helped ya concentrate, Inara had said. So, Jayne figured concentratin was good for Crazy, as she seemed to flit about the place all the time. But he'd been thinkin. Sure, the girl could do all sorts a stuff with her head, like read them big words and do that math to plot a course for the ship and kill people, but he figured she didn't know everything. And the merc knew that part of putting something back together meant you needed all the parts.

So, he got her calm, and now he needed to figure out how to find all her parts. One of 'em was pretty easy for him to guess- after all, she grew up on a fancy core planet, with lotsa learnin and stuff. The next planet they was setting down on was Arthena, and the last time he was here he'd seen something he figured would bring back a part a her.

So when the crew left him and Crazy alone in the kitchen, with his guns (it was a habit now, cleanin them with her), he only let her clean them once. As he kited himself out in the freshly cleaned guns, and strapped Binky and Boo into place, he said, "Come on Crazy I gotsa surprise for ya."

And damn if the chit's eyes didn't light right up.

Jayne figured she might know what the surprise was, with her creepy mind-reading ways, but he kinda didn't really mind. And hey, maybe she hadn't peeked.

Crazy stepped in front of him, eyes serious. "The girl kept out of your thoughts- mind only was seen."

The merc frowned, then shrugged. He didn't quite get what all of the meant, but he got the part that said she hadn't seen her present. He smirked. "Come on then, before we lose the light."

Her sudden smile was contagious, and Jayne fought to keep it off his face. This wasn't the best of towns they were walking through, and he needed to look even tougher than normal because of Crazy hanging off his arm. But they got there, finally, and the look on the girl's face when she saw the size of the shop was, in Jayne's head, hilarious.

Moonbrain stepped into the bookstore like it was a dream, walking like one of them dancers in a fancy holovid. The store was pretty empty, unless ya count the bored clerk at the counter, but the merc scanned for entrances and exits anyway. When he felt eyes on him, he glance back at Crazy. She was holding a stack of books, bouncing anxiously on her toes. The eyes he'd felt had been worried ones.

He snorted. "I wouldn't a called it a present if I didn't intend to buy them for ya, Crazy. Though we gotta leave in 'bout twenty minutes to get back afore dark falls." When she just stood there, he snapped, "So get your gorram arse hunting for those _go se_ books you like so much!"

The girl didn't waste a second. Dropping that pile on the counter, next to the very startled clerk, she dashed back into the rows of books, humming under her breath. Jayne got bored though, and slid Binky out of her sheath, scaring the boy behind the counter. But he simply tossed the knife up and down, liking the solid thump the handle made as it landed in his palm.

And he got the added pleasure of scaring the shit outta the boy, which made up for what he figured was gonna be a gorram fortune spent on books, of all things. Not even food. Though if there was any left credits left over…

Glancing outside, Jayne snapped "Crazy! We gotta go." When she appeared from the aisles he couldn't believe how many books she'd found. Irritated with himself, and what he thought was a waste of money, the merc tossed a bag of credits at the girl, who counted them out for the clerk.

After the boy bagged them up, and Crazy handed his credits back, Jayne grabbed the bags and handed the money back to the moonbrain. "We're gonna get fruit too. I want something outta this" he growled when she just stared at him.

There was the batshit insane smile again.

And damned if he didn't like it.

Mal paced back and forth angrily, wondering where the _fuck_ his mercenary had gotten off to, and with River, too! He swore to god if one hair on that girls head had been harmed he was gonna gut the motherless cur himself.

The whole crew was anxiously waiting in the cargo hold, Mal noted. He wondered if any of them would try to stop him from killing the son of a bitch of River was hurt, or, or… He was too furious to notice when the crew stood at once, though Kaylee running down the ramp and Zoe following with her Mare's Leg out and cocked caught his attention.

Two figured appeared out of the dark- his big (soon to be dead) merc, and River. Mal didn't waste any time before he started yelling. "Where the gorram hell did you take her, Jayne?"

The merc's face got dark with anger and Mal shifted, getting ready for a fight. But River interrupted before either of them could say anything. "Presents!" She danced happily over to Simon, grabbing his hand and bringing him over to Jayne. She opened one of the bags in the man's arms- the Mal hadn't noticed until now- and pulled out… Books.

Simon exclaimed in delight and took one of the bags from Jayne, rummaging around in it with a smile on his face. River hugged one of the books to her chest, humming happily as she bounced in place. The rest of the crew just stood there, shocked, til Inara stepped forward.

"Jayne," she asked smoothly, "what is in the other bag?"

Mal watched in shock as the merc flushed bright red. River bounced some more, happily announcing that "The man with a girl's name found delicious plant offspring for consumption."

Jayne gorram hated when people fussed over him. Which is what Kaylee and Inara were doing to him. So he'd bought the girl some gorram books! Wasn't like he'd bought her something expense, or something. He just wanted them to leave him alone, so he growled and snarled at them, grabbed some of the fruit he'd purchased, and retreated to his bunk.

The only good part of the day, in his opinion, had been that he'd found another part to the girl. The merc figured that since fancy learnin was what she'd grown up with, that it'd be a part of her and he was right. And accordin to the girl, he'd taught her medatation, or whatever it was, and that helped her think.

He fell back onto his bed, arm across his eyes as he munched on the apple. There was still lots more he had to figure out about the girl.


	6. Chapter 6

Weapon 6

Mal wanted to take the moonbrain out on the next job, and Jayne was having no part of it. So far as he was concerned, the girl was broken, and so shouldn't be trusted to do her whole job. No one else seemed to think that, though. Except Simon, and the merc didn't wanna count on having the Doc on his side as a good thing.

"No. She ain't coming with us." Jayne said, trying to get them to listen to him. But they all spoke over him, and he growled in frustration.

Mal and Zoe were both willing to let her come, though opposing them was Simon, Kaylee and Inara, not to mention Jayne himself. Book was staying out of the fight, as was Wash, though both of them were looking worried.

He growled again, feeling eyes on his back. The girl might look like she was put together alright, but she wasn't and he didn't wanna chance to see what would happen if they put her under pressure. The best thing that would happen would be that she froze up. The merc didn't wanna even think about what else could happen. A small hand landed on his shoulder blade, and a whisper hit his ears. "She is broken- wait til all parts are acquired before displaying deadly weapon." And even softer, "Captain Daddy has little expectation of confrontation, be prepared for adrenaline."

Jayne figured that was as clear as her words had come out in a while. She knew he was trying to fix her, which he'd figured, and Mal was gonna get shot at. So while Crazy went to calm the crew down, the merc went and got more guns. Best not ignore the moonbrain, 'specially when she talks about people getting shot at.

~~~  
>He was in the infirmary again.<p>

But at least this time it was for cuts and scrapes, and not any bullet holes. Crazy had been right about the job going south- hell, Jayne should have expected it, what with it bein a Mal plan and all. Mal plans rarely went right. But they had the credits, and they was heading to Venitia for a break. Couple a days planet side might be good for everyone, the merc figured, being as we're all right on top of each other most of the time. And that planet was pretty this time a year.

This time, instead of hearing the girl sneaking up on him, his nose caught her sent as it got to the room before her. She ignored Simon's greeting as she looked Jayne over. He growled at her, and she sniffed, and then made a face. "You offend my olfactory glands." She informed him. The Doc laughed as the merc tried to figured that one out, and failed.

"She means," the man explained, "that she thinks you stink. And I quite agree."

"Hey now, doc, that ain't fair! I was out in the sun all day keeping everyone alive!" Jayne said, tired and irritable. He scratched his chin, feeling stubble, and getting even more ornery.

Simon merely laughed, and the girl smiled. "There is an easy way to take care of it, Jayne. Just take a shower, it won't kill you."

Jayne growled on his way out, past the happy siblings. He'd almost made it to his bunk when he heard Crazy behind him. "What." He snapped without looking behind him. She stayed quite as he dropped into his bunk and grabbed some towels and a chance of clothes before coming back up. But when he got back into the hallway, she placed her little hand on his chest.

"The girl is broken. But she won't always be?"

Jayne figured she'd been quite as long as she had, to make sure she was as clear as possible. And hell that was the clearest thing she'd said in months. But he heard the worry underneath. "Nah, Crazy. Not always."

Venitia was a riot of colors and shady trees when they landed, the planet's spring having just begun. Wash and Zoe had already told the Captain that they were going to have some "Wifey and husband" time, and they'd be back in three days. Simon was dead set on taking Kaylee out every night, wanting to speed along his wooing as quickly as possible, and Mal puttered around the ship in a snit because Inara was Mediating the whole break. Jayne had to laugh at that. Book wanted to stock up on fresh produce, and had asked the merc to fill the pantry with fresh meat. He'd readily agreed.

And he figured this was the perfect time to teach the girl some control. Sure, she could kill a man with one bullet hole to the head with her eyes closed, but he needed to be sure she could do that without someone being in danger. Hell, he just needed to know what she like when she was sane and handling a gun.

So Jayne brought the moonbrain with him when he went out hunting.

He brought the big bag a guns with him too. Without Mal snooping over his shoulder the merc wanted to try her with every type a gun he had with him. Jayne stopped them right inside the forest, as soon as they were out of sight of the ship. Crazy looked at him funny and Jayne explained.

"We're gonna see what you know about all this stuff, got it Crazy?" when she nodded he continued. "Now, what I want ya to do I find a herd of deer." A split second later she started out west, and Jayne called her to a halt. "Why are you going that way?"

She frowned. "Said to find herd of deer." She answered, confused.

The merc nodded. "Now tell me why you're going that way, and not any other."

Crazy tilted her head at him, thinking. "West has a right conditions for deer, others do not. Also, foot path-" and she pointed about fifteen feet away.

"Alright" Jayne said. Let's keep going." Whenever moonbrain changed directions, he made her stop and explain why, much to her frustration. But she needed to know why she was doing the things she was doing, and this was the only way he could think to show her that.

By the time they found a small herd of deer, he could tell Crazy was more than a little angry. But she hadn't killed him with her brain yet, so he figured he was golden. She turned to him and held her hand out for a gun, almost as silent as the merc himself. He handed over the LeMatt, and within half a second she had spun around, picked a target, and shot the deer through the brainpan.

He smiled. "Nice shot. Now, tell me how ya did that so fast- spell it out, like." And Jayne watched her face as she detailed how she made allowances for the wind, followed the target to make sure she had a good clean shot, and everything that goes onto hunting.

Jayne planned on making her spell everything out to him over the rest of the day- Crazy had ta be able ta understand her own talents, even the ones that the Academy gave her. And then practice them, over and over, until she know what she was doing and why instead of acting on instinct.

He just hoped she didn't turn the gun on him.

Broken girl was getting better- not there yet but almost, maybe. Day of hunting met with happiness from family, bear man not saying Crazy girl had brought down the food, but that was ok. Bear man protects his secret project, and she likes that. She likes being his secret.

Productive day, too, not just food gained but knowledge. Bear man says must know why, must know _how_, so she can control talent. And she does, thanks to man with girls name. She dances around the cargo bay, because she can, because it is a piece of her and she accepts it.

Comments? Questions? Feel free to review!

Lol


	7. Chapter 7

Weapon 7

Halfway through the downtime, and Jayne's pretty sure he's got the girl most of the way to normal. Well, maybe a bit more than halfway there. Anyway, he figures she's better now then she was, so its all good. Hunting with her was fun, the merc had realized a day of two ago. 'Specially when she weren't mad at him anymore. So he was whistling when he hit the kitchen, thinking about heading back out and working on the broken weapon some more.

But the air in the kitchen made him tense up and lose his happy. Something was up, and he scanned faces to see who it was. Mal looked resigned, Inara unhappy, and Simon wasn't around. "What the gorram hell is going on?" he demanded.

Kaylee responded from the door. "River had a nightmare last night, and she's having one of her… off days." Jayne growled and rubbed his chest, thinking. She continued with "Simon has her in the infirmary- he's gonna give her a smoother." Another growl rumbled through his chest, and Kaylee sighed. "It's for the best, I guess. She needs to calm down after last night."

Right as she said that Crazy shrieked from the cargo bay, and everyone jumped, then bolted for the hold. When they got there, Simon had backed River into a corner, trying to coax her to into letting him give her the drugs in the syringe. He head whipped back and forth, trying to find an exit, and Jayne cursed as he watched all his hard work draining away. Seeing an opportunity, the girl darted under Simons arm and tried to run, but she got caught by Mal.

Kicking and screaming, Simon grabbed her arm and tried to get the needle into a vein but it was no ude she was moving to much.

With a curse, Jayne stood up and stalked over, doing the only thing he could think of. He slapped her.

Hard.

Everyone froze. Even Simon forgot to take advantage of the now still arm in front of him as he stared at the merc in shock. Mal's grip slackened, and Crazy slid out of his arms as her cheek blossomed in red. The click of the Mare's Leg cocking seemed to wake Crazy up, and he had half a second to smile darkly before the girl launched herself at him. He'd seen the attack she planned play out in her eyes in that half second, so when she went to sweep his feet out from under him he moved out of the way and slapped her in the stomach, infuriating her.

Then the real fight began. He held his punches and kicks, while Crazy did her utmost to try and kill him. Jayne knew her programming from the Academy was kicked in, and just defending himself from her attacks was incredibly hard- but he still threw in the occasional slap, trying to get her so angry her programming failed. And when it did, he slammed her into a wall, forearm across her throat and both wrists caught in one hand, and said, "You back yet?"

They stared at each other, and over the sound of Mal and Zoe cocking their guns and screaming at Jayne to get away from her, the merc heard her say, lowly enough that he had to strain to hear it, "Yes. Academy programming successfully overruled."

He grinned at her. "Then maybe you can do something bout them guns that's trained on my back?"

She giggled. "Crazy can walk, should feet touch firm surface." Jayne took his hint and set her down, spinning around behind her so no one tried to get off a shot.

Mal and Zoe had their guns trained on him, Simon holding the needle fulla of drugs as menacingly as possible.

Mal spoke first, after the yelling had died down. "Get off of my ship."

"No." Everyone stared at Crazy like she really was.

"What do you mean, no?" Mal asked. "He hit you!"

"Coded program override, hidden in plain sight." When no one seemed to understand, the girl turned to her brother with raised eyebrow. "Explain." She ordered him.

Simon hesitated, dropping his syringe from its ready to pierce skin position. "River…"

She stamped her foot and Jayne rolled his eyes. He'd fucking tell them. "Been working with Crazy." He said. "Teaching her to think for herself." He ignored the gasps and the wide eyes of his crew members. "So's when the Academy programming kicks in, she can shake it off. Like today."

Kaylee pointed at him with a shaking finger. "But she didn't- you hit her!"

Jayne snorted. "She'd a been fine if the good Doc" he sneered "he left her alone after the nightmares, insteada trying ta stick her full of drugs that makes her loony." Simon looked ashamed, and intruigued. Odd combination of a look, the merc thought. "So, I got her angry, and then I played with her til she broke the programming herself."

Mal still looked downright murderous, but Zoe and the other girls were looking at him like they'd never seen him before. Wash and Book, too, were eying him.

The captain turned to Crazy. "Hey albatross, this true? He been" Mal paused for a second, then continued with "helping you all this time?"

"Yes." Crazy said simply.

"Looks like you escaped the airlock again, Jayne."

They sat together in the kitchen, polishing Jayne's guns. Inara and Book moved around them as they prepared dinner, simply choosing to watch the two at the table. The merc didn't mind, and he doubted Crazy had noticed. Her eyes were half closed, her hands following the routine he'd made her memorize weeks ago. He leaned back in his chair, hands folded across his waist as he waited for Crazy to finish up. This was his kinda night- not fightin, not swearing or trying to not die (though those were fine ways to spend an evening). Nah, he was waiting for food, and the broken weapon was pretty much ok.

And whatever they were cooking smelled wonderful

Polishing rag goes round in circles, bringing her mind with it, in endless circles no one can touch. She liked it when her mind was quiet, she liked when the bear man's thought went in a straight line. No sudden twists or bends to get caught in.

Thinking her own thoughts was fun. Must rename the bear, she thought. Not lumbering enough. Too fast and lean. Must think must think….

But later. Food is here, family is here, Man with a girls name will help keep thoughts straight so she can talk to her family and be understood.

New name for the bear man….

One more chap, maybe two


	8. Chapter 8

Weapon 8

Good think about that vacation, Jayne had decided, was that the girl was easier to understand. Said less stuff in a riddle ya had to puzzle through. And she used smaller words. Made jokes now, and danced all around like a butterfly. Fun to watch, that was. And now Mal and Zoe are asking the girl if she wants to come on the next job, and she says yes. The merc was, he had ta admit it, gonna be happy to have her along. What with the way Mal's planning always went, and all.

"Zoe how come you never make the plans?" Jayne asked plaintively, only to get laughed at. Well damn them all the gorram hell and back the merc thought.

A small hand landed on his shoulder, worried eyes looking right into his brain. "No clear path, take care. Trouble flies like a bullet." He nodded, understanding the warning. Someone was gonna get shot. Again.

The mule sped off from the cargo hold, Jayne, Mal, Zoe and Crazy on board. They was supposed to be meeting the client at an abandoned warehouse- the merc had scoped it out earlier and point blank told the captain he didn't like this idea. Mal shrugged, still angry about the slapping Crazy thing.

Jayne growled, but he and the girl picked a spot with decent cover to watch their crew. Ten or fifteen minutes passed before another mule rumbled to a stop about thirty feet from Mal. The driver got out, along with the buyer. Both were well dressed, but given Crazy's warning he didn't let his guard down. Trusting the girl to keep the captain and first mate safe for a bit, he scanned the horizon, looking for something that didn't fit.

And… he found it. The second he saw the gunman, Crazy tensed next to him. "If ya can get in his head, see if there are others. We can take them out right now."

"I can tr-" before she could even finish the sentence, Zoe went down with a bullet in the calf. Jayne burst from cover with a curse, sighting and killing the man that shot her before looking for the others. He took down another one as Crazy joined him, filling up heads with bullets too. Mal had his hands full with the driver and the buyer, for once actually seeming to win a fight.

Then the world slowed down, and felt like it exploded in pain. Jayne was only vaguely aware of dropping to his knees, hand coming up to cover the hole in his chest, some small part noting with relief it was on the wrong side of his heart. The world was spinning, moving in and out, and he thought he heard the screaming stop. A small face filled his vision as he passed out.

Pain. Yea. Lotsa pain. _So must mean I'm alive_. Bleary eyes opened to see the white of the infirmary. Feeling like his head weighed a million tons, he rolled his head to the left, squinting when he saw Kaylee sitting in the chair next to him. "Kay…" he tried to say, his voice coming out as little more than a whisper. "Kaylee." He tried again, and she jerked awake as if slapped.

"Oh Jayne I'm so glad you're awake let me go get Simon!" and just like that she was gone. He managed a tired grin.

She was back almost immediately, bringing the almost whole crew with her. Wash helped a limping Zoe into the rooms only chair, her lower leg encase completely in a cast. Mal leaned against a wall, Book was holding his book close to his heart, Kaylee and Inara were hugging each other.

Jayne rolled his head to look at Simon. "Can I go to my bunk now?" he asked in a whisper.

The doc smiled and shook his head. "No, sorry Jayne but you get to stay here for a little while yet."

"Then someone," he paused for a breath, then continued with "lower the gorram lights." Someone did so right away and Jayne sighed out a thanks as he drifted back to sleep.

He'd been stuck in the gorram hospital bed for two weeks before he was allowed back into his room, and he gave a sigh of relief to be outta that damn bright arse room. At least in here everything smelled right- leather conditioner, gun oil, Crazy- wait a second. "What are you doing in my room, Crazy?"

She shifted from her spot on his bed. "Prior programming won out over secondary training. Acted on instinct instead."

Jayne really wanted to tell her to repeat herself, but he knew this was real clear, at least for her. He puzzled it out for a second. "You mean, the Academy? When?"

"When your shoulder turned red and ran and ran-" he sat down on the bed and awkwardly put his good arm around her.

"Well now," he started, "if ya let the programming take hold how come we ain't all dead?"

Crazy looked up. "I- I don't know." She wiped the tears of a her face and Jayne looked away for a second.

"Yes you do. Because you are stronger than that gorram Academy and all the _go se_ they did to your brainpan. Hell and you proved it- Mal was real impressed over how you killed all them suckers with head shots." He squeezed her close, then dropped his arm. "Scram, now. I gotta get me some shut eye."

Crazy stood up, bounced on her toes for a second, then scrambled up the ladder. Jayne sighed. He doubted this was the last time he was gonna have that particular conversation with the girl.

Mentor of the past months sat alone at table, surrounded by his girls. And he was making them look shiny too- all new and clean. Break them down, find the pieces, clean them up, put together. "Will she blow up in your face?" she asked the man.

He looked at her for a second before he understood her. "Oh. Nope. Don't think so." He went back to polishing his weapons.

"Is she polished? Ready for the world?"

He set the barrel he was holding down and carefully looked at her. "Well, you're sure shiny on the outside, and your heads on straight. Might be you aint quite so broke anymore."

She smiled, and he grinned back. She turned to leave, then stopped in the doorway. "You know, panthers on Earth That Was? Lonely hunters, but they protect their family."

And she left him to think about that.

Panther. Yes, panther on the prowl, all sleek muscle and dark fur. And deadly.

There ya go, folks. Hope you like it as much as I do 


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